I just asked my husband what my eldest daughter's bedtime was like before we had the baby. I think it was usually pretty easygoing, and a nice time of the day. She would have a bath most nights, then bedtime with reading, singing and lots of cuddles.
I'm reflecting today that lots of my friends seem to have trouble with sleeping for both children after their second child is born. I wonder if it is a more stressful time? My non-parent friends suspect I don't do a lot all day, but I would rather go to work on a hectic day than do the dinner-bath-bed marathon with two preschoolers. Dinner starts around 4.30pm. I discovered that my older daughter can get just too tired to eat, and the earlier she eats the more likely it is that she will eat well. When the baby was just starting solids I would have to hand feed her (up to thirty minutes) as well as a thirty minute breastfeed. My oldest needed supervision and sometimes cajoling. Until the girls were safe to bath together I would either alternate nights or shower them in the mornings. Depending on creche activities sometimes my daughter would absolutely need bathing. Then bedtime. I've never bothered with pyjamas for young babies but there is a nappy change, breastfeed, burp and tuck up in bed. My oldest daughter would typically watch TV while I did this. Then thirty minutes of reading, changing, teeth & toilet, heaps of questions then off to sleep. I would then collapse around 7.30, feeling as though I had been beaten with a stick.
That was a good day too. There would be night wake ups, or trouble getting to sleep. Sometimes I would be holding a screaming baby or breastfeeding while putting the eldest to bed (and she would be annoyed because she would have her guaranteed attention time interrupted).
I like to tell people how hard it is, because it is hard, rough and there are a lot of tears before, during and after bedtime. It gets easier, but it takes a long time. It isn't surprising that there are sleep problems during this time, I suspect that it is the norm.
